Monday, January 28, 2008

Two Days

...and counting. That's how long until the boy reappears for the first time since June. To say that I am giddily anticipating this would be an understatement. I'm also, frankly, a little terrified. We haven't been face-to-face since June. A lot has happened. Sure we talk every single day, but that's just the thing. So many landmark, big deal events have been dealt with, supported, celebrated, etc. via the written word. And while there are some things that we both absolutely refuse to say for the first time in print (eg. I love you), there's a lot of growth established on the words we typed across the miles.

While I know that we are two far too principled human beings to say anything on paper that we wouldn't say in person, you can't argue with the fact that sometimes the added illusion of detachment makes it easier to get it out.

So then the question becomes: What if we're better on paper than in real life? What if, without the established ease and rapport built up over these long months apart, we run out of things to say? What if I'm not nearly as witty and charming as I lead y'all to believe with my quirky little turns of phrase and expressions? (Don't answer that.)

Rationally, I know that I'm over-thinking this; that everything will be fine and the two of us will be able to pick up in person precisely where we left off, only perhaps even more unable to keep our hands off one another in public. (It's sad really. We see each other so infrequently that whenever we are together, it seems we need to be touching - holding hands, kissing, leaning against one another, something..) Yet still I've got jitters. Big time. FPS, people! I've lost my will to knit with all this worrying!

Repeat after me: Everything will be fine, everything will be fine, fine?

In knitting news, his knitty surprise is finished and up on Ravelry, but I won't be disclosing here until after gifting. (Just in case he's found this. We will not discuss the irrationality of me being okay with him reading all about my pre-visit jitters and not about his surprise.) Suffice it to say that It. Is. AWESOME. Seriously. I'm tempted to keep it. And if you want to find me on Ravelry to check it out yourself, just search for my moniker OneRedSock and there I'll be.

Now. I need to get my butt in gear to go to class and do me some learnin! Happy Monday!

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